Types of friends
If life thought me something that is the different versions of friends.
There are few types of friends (that I’ve met in my life).
1. The vampire friend
Those who are nice to you and hang out with you as long as you give them what they need. Deny them the object of their desire and watch how they transform into a heartless demon and your friendship crumbles. ( This sounds like a quote from a Shakespeare’s poem.)
2. The changer
People who change friends every few months, I guess new friend for each season. Like humans are some kind of a seasonal accessories. Those people will probably die alone.
3. The forgivable illusionist
People who were once friends with the changer and they actually wait for them and when they ”come back” to them the illusionist forgets everything and acts like nothing happened and even calls the changer their best friend. (The changer will usually fuck off these guys in a very rude manner, not responding to their texts, calls, hardly saying hi to them when they encounter each other and with a hint of the changer coming back to Illusionist, the illusionist will drop to their knees and welcome them with open arms.. It is like when you trow away your beautiful winter scarf because it is sunny and you don’t need it anymore and with the first cold breeze you look at your scarf and that thing wraps around your neck and makes you feel good and comfy like nothing ever happened, like you never acted as a bitch.)
4. The adviser
Those friends are very close to you and they usually have very good advice and you end up calling them or going for a drink with them to hear their advice. But on the other hand you can’t really depend on them cause they always have an excuse. You try to ask them for a favor and somehow they find a way to avoid it. And their excuses are so lame that you feel bad for them and in the end you forgive them. Like, oh I’m sorry, I can’t, I think it may snow today (and it is June and you are going to the beach). Or, I’m sorry, but you live 15 kilometers away but my brother can only give me a ride as far as 14 kilometers from our house. I’m sorry, I can’t, my mom is making dinner and I have to go to another country to buy some clothes. I’m sorry, but I think I’m dead.
5. The on- off friend
These kind of people are actually an evolution of the changer people. They are here when they are single. They call you, they hang out with you, they are so boring that they are literally killing you on the inside. But when they find their better half they pass by you as if you are a tree. And not a beautiful tree full of fruits, no no. A tree that nobody likes and everybody wants to cut it down. At the very moment they are without their boyfriend/girlfriend duo to the breakup or their partner has to go somewhere for a while, TA- DA! You are their toy again.
6. The true buddy
People who are friends with you for many years. Best friends. You call them names, they call you names. You gossip with them, you make fun of them and they make fun of you. You don’t hug, don’t kiss and yet you are best friends for almost 2 decades and your family loves them and their family loves you.
I’ve noticed that a lot of people around me don’t have the number 6. in their life and I pity them.